❝The north's best striker is usually cool and calm until he's on the pitch...❞
As capricious as the weather, Shirou Fubuki is difficult to define in just a few words. At first glance, he appears to be as soft as fresh fallen snow and, on occasion, as playful as a gentle gust of wind. However, as someone who suffers from trauma-inflicted Dissociative Identity Disorder, there is more to him than meets the eye. Shirou's personality is something of a patchwork creation comprised of both his true self and the memory of his late twin brother and polar opposite, Atsuya. Where Shirou is amiable and level-headed, Atsuya is contentious and rowdy — and together, they are perfect.
Or, at least, Shirou believes they are. But that belief could not be further from the truth.
Much as Shirou thinks he knows what it means to be perfect, his idea is a fragmented concept borne from the event that cost him the lives of both his parents and his brother: the avalanche that occurred at the Northern Ridge in Hokkaido, Japan when he was still just a child. During the moments preceding that fateful accident, one of the last things his father said to him and his brother were the words, "Then with the two of you together, you're perfect."
And then, suddenly, the mountain had claimed his family. He was without his parents and his other half, robbed not only of what he thought he needed to be perfect, but the support he would have required to remain whole as well. Is it any wonder that, after he'd been thrust from the car by his brother, he had shattered like so much thin ice and clung desperately to any memories that would allow him to stay afloat?
Yet, despite the tragedy of his past, the person whom Shirou became afterwards wasn't bitter or cold by any stretch of the imagination. As he grew from an adolescent into a young teenager of fourteen, he retained many of the more distinguishing characteristics of his younger self: a strong sense of right and wrong, a kind heart, a playful and thrill-seeking enthusiasm, and an unfathomable love of soccer. But, broken as he was, Shirou was not all that survived. Buried deep within him, summoned from a scarf that he wears that once belonged to his brother, and borne of his deep-seated fear of being alone, was also Atsuya's personality: his competitive spirit, one-man-army play style, impetuous behavior, and tendency towards explosive emotional outbursts. In middle school, this discordant combination allowed Shirou to assume multiple functions for Hakuren Junior High's soccer team, operating as their primary defender, ace striker, and as their captain. While his teammates supported and cared for him, it seemed there was no one willing to actively nurture his damaged psyche, the result of which was a player who did pretty much...whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted, without anyone to tell him otherwise. And this worked for a time, even if Shirou built up quite the reputation for himself in the process.
A reputation that brought the Inazuma Caravan to Hokkaido just to find him, in fact, and a reputation that made him virtually unrecognizable to their players when they first met. Outwardly unassuming, Shirou doesn't seem to match all the reports of his prowess on the soccer field or his exploits in Hokkaido's snowfields. He is generally soft-spoken and smiling, and he doesn't seem threatening in the least. It is because these things belie the presence of mischief that most people never suspect him of being a lady charmer or a prankster when, in fact, he is both in equal measure — and even seems to find some amusement in the misconceptions people have based on the gossip surrounding him, some of which is unfounded, and some of which happen to be rather aptly earned, as in the case of his nickname, "Bear Killer."
Though, of course, this nickname doesn't belong to him as much as it belongs to "Atsuya," who takes over whenever Shirou needs to go on the offensive, even manifesting physical changes such as glowing golden eyes and winged hair. Which isn't to suggest that Shirou avoids all confrontation, for he seems to be virtually fearless in all areas of his life, and even when things seem at their most grim, he is only ever visibly shaken when he hears a sound reminiscent of the loud roar of snow tearing down a mountainside, or his ability to conquer his adversaries is called into question. As such, it should come as no surprise that winning is everything to him.
Because if he can't win, then he's not perfect, and if that's true...then what use does he have, what function does he serve? Why is he even still alive?
These are questions he asks himself when he's not riding high on the adrenaline offered by success and the love of his friends and teammates in Hakuren and the Inazuma Caravan, the latter of which provides Shirou with so much purpose that, to take anyone away from him suddenly is to cause a very rapid, very violent backslide. The importance of the bonds he's forged (or wants to forge) with his teammates in the Caravan run incredibly deep, and the strongest of them are clutched so closely to his heart that to lose even one is to lose a part of himself and what he wants to be. And that's kind of a big deal for someone not equipped to deal with loss on any level, especially when those bonds are forged in blood, sweat, and tears and he has a tendency to shape who he is by whom he can most successfully combine forces with.
It isn't a healthy ambition, to be sure. But it's prominent in all aspects of his life. From the way that he obediently follows some orders despite his own preferences because he desires the acceptance of others, to the way that he'll also
disobey an order to charge straight ahead and for a victory he knows his team wants with the same burning passion that exists in his heart.
He wants to be surrounded by the people he cares about, to be with them, to tease them, to play soccer with them, to have
fun and be just like the wind, without a care and free, but he also wants desperately to be needed, to be useful, to keep Atsuya's memory and spirit alive, and above all else, to be
perfect — and this division, as with any hole that ice has begun to form within, will continue to splinter and
crack with time. Because Shirou just doesn't know yet how to let go of his past, and doesn't know what it truly means to be perfect.